Jackie Corrigan
Doctoral Candidate
Antioch University New England
During my training as a student, one of the most profound and formative experiences was leading four group therapy sessions per week on an inpatient unit. Each group was unpredictable and exhilarating—I never quite knew what to expect. The unit often had a designated skill of the week, and group topics ranged from developing positive coping strategies, setting boundaries, and being a respectful participant, to taking another’s perspective. While these weekly topics offered structure, the overarching themes I worked to weave into every session were safety, accountability, friendship, and empathy. These principles formed the emotional foundation of the group and were particularly vital for children navigating trauma, loss, and relational disruption.
Lisa Dion said it best: “You are the most important toy in the playroom” (Dion, 2006), referring to the therapist. This idea stayed with me throughout my group work. Ultimately, it is the relationship between the child and therapist that becomes the primary healing agent in the room. Neuroscience supports this, showing that right-brain-to-right-brain attuned communication helps regulate and heal emotional dysregulation. However, to offer that kind of attunement, a therapist must first be regulated herself (Dion, 2006).
That part is not always easy—especially as a student. It can be incredibly difficult to manage the many roles we hold: taking classes, conducting dissertation research, navigating practicum responsibilities, preparing for internship, and—perhaps most fundamentally—trying to simply exist in this world. Amid all of that, it’s easy to feel stretched thin. But this work demands presence, and being present requires care. Especially in group therapy, where children who have experienced profound relational trauma are looking to us for co-regulation, it is essential that we are doing the work to care for ourselves. Being attuned, consistent, and grounded in the room is not automatic; it takes energy, intention, and deep internal resourcing. I learned that being my best therapeutic self meant taking myself seriously outside the therapy room too—finding ways to rest, to reflect, and to stay connected to what grounds me.
While the group topics were essential for teaching coping and relational skills, I came to realize that the true intervention was the presence of the group leader. From an attachment lens, the group leader creates an emotionally safe, structured, and responsive environment—often the only one some of these children have known. For many of the children on the unit, consistent adult relationships were rare, if not absent altogether. In that context, the group leader becomes not just a facilitator, but an attachment figure—someone who shows up, regulates with them, and models what safe connection looks like.
Flexibility was a cornerstone of my approach. There were times when I danced with the kids, sat silently beside them, completed mazes and word searches, provided psychoeducation, or allowed the children to lead the activities. This adaptability was essential to meet each child where they were emotionally and developmentally. It also communicated respect for their pace and preferences, fostering a sense of safety and empowerment. By shifting fluidly between structured teaching and spontaneous connection, I was better able to build trust and deepen engagement, laying the groundwork for therapeutic progress. Often, I tried to model this by showing that I would support whatever energy each child brought into the group, I was willing to meet them there. I accepted them fully, for all that they were.
Beyond the individual relationship with the group leader, I learned that group therapy itself could be one of the children’s favorite parts of the day. This was not only because of the deep connection with a reliable adult who consistently showed up, but also because the children experienced being in a room filled with peers who shared similar experiences of trauma. For many, this reduced feelings of isolation and fostered a unique sense of belonging. The community created in these groups offered a corrective relational experience in itself, something many of these children had never encountered before.
Moreover, the presence of an incredible behavioral health team who supported the children during group each week added another layer of love and consistency. In the inpatient setting where I worked, two behavioral health staff were required to be present during group, so the children always knew that three caring adults would be there with them. Witnessing multiple adults actively invested in their well-being reinforced the message that they mattered and were supported. Group therapy, like much of life, truly takes a village. The community that group therapy establishes is crucial for healing and growth, offering these children not only skills but also a network of relational safety.
Structure, co-regulation, and relational modeling remained my primary tools. Some children were hesitant to engage or even make eye contact at first. Others tested boundaries, not out of defiance, but to confirm if I was really going to stay. Over time, simply showing up consistently every Tuesday and Wednesday for eight months became one of the most powerful interventions. I began to notice that once the children sensed that I was truly with them, they started reaching for the skills we practiced. In their own time, they began to trust, regulate, and even initiate connection.
As I reflect on this experience, I’m reminded of the A.R.E. framework in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), developed by Dr. Sue Johnson. This framework—Accessible, Responsive, and Engaged—captures the essence of what it means to be a secure base for someone (Johnson, 2006; Johnson & Greenman, 2006).
Accessible refers to being emotionally available and present in a way that invites others to approach and seek comfort. It means lowering barriers and showing openness, signaling to others that it is safe to connect (Johnson, 2006; Johnson & Talitman, 1997). In my group leadership, this meant creating a space where children felt they could reach out without fear of judgment or rejection. Responsive involves attuning to others’ emotional needs and signals, responding in a way that acknowledges and validates their experience (Johnson, 2006; Johnson & Greenman, 2006). It is not just about being physically present, but about understanding and meeting the emotional needs that arise in the moment. For the children in the group, this translated into recognizing their fears, frustrations, or confusion and responding with empathy and reassurance. Engaged means actively participating in the relational exchange, showing genuine interest and investment in the other’s emotional world (Johnson, 2006; Wiebe & Johnson, 2016). Engagement fosters trust and deepens connection, encouraging others to open up more fully. During group sessions, this was demonstrated by my attentive listening, encouragement, and authentic interactions.
The therapeutic relationship is the foundation upon which all other skills can be built. My experience facilitating group therapy with children on an inpatient unit has shown me that healing often begins not with words, but with presence. Over time, I’ve come to deeply appreciate the power of showing up, of co-regulating, and of holding space for children who have endured significant relational trauma. This work has not only reinforced my belief in the healing power of safe, consistent relationships, but has also grown my love for group therapy as a modality. What started as a weekly responsibility quickly became a treasured part of my training—one that challenged me, shaped me, and reaffirmed why I chose this field. Group therapy has taught me how to attune more deeply, lead with flexibility, and offer stability in moments that are anything but stable. It’s in that shared space, where coping meets connection, that I’ve seen some of the most meaningful therapeutic shifts unfold. And for that, I’m incredibly grateful.
References
Dion, L. (2006). Play therapy: The art of the relationship. Routledge.
Johnson, S. M., & Talitman, E. (1997). Predictors of success in emotionally focused marital
therapy. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 23(2), 135–152.
https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1752-0606.1997.tb00205.x
Johnson, S. M. (2006). The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy: Creating
Connection (2nd ed.). Brunner-Routledge.
Johnson, S. M., & Greenman, P. S. (2006). The path to a secure bond: Emotionally focused
couple therapy. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 62(5), 597–609.
https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.20251
Johnson, S. M. (2008). Hold me tight: Seven conversations for a lifetime of love. Little, Brown
and Company.
Wiebe, S. A., & Johnson, S. M. (2016). Emotionally focused therapy: Innovations in research
and practice. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 42(1), 46-58. https://doi.org/10.1